The Problem With #MeToo

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The phrase "Me Too" was originally coined in 2006 by Tarana Burke, an African American civil rights activist, who began using it to raise awareness of the widespread prevalence of sexual abuse and assault.  It wasn't until October 2017, however, that the hashtag of #MeToo was launched into the mainstream.

Actress Alyssa Milano is credited with greatly helping the hashtag go viral by encouraging other women to collectively use social media to bring attention to the pervasiveness of sexual assault and harassment, particularly in the workplace.  Her aim was to "give people a sense of the magnitude of the problem". 

Great intention and massive action then combined in an extremely powerful and profound way.  The now ubiquitous #MeToo hashtag has since been posted online millions of times.  Countless numbers of women, including many high-profile celebrities, have publicly announced that they have been victims of sexual assault.

In the wake of this, there has been a huge outcry regarding this issue, most notably in Hollywood.  Several actresses have since claimed that sexual assault is rife within the movie industry.  As a result, many of the Hollywood elite have been accused of abusing their powerful positions and repeatedly committing the most heinous forms of sexual assault. 

The most famous example is Harvey Weinstein, the multi-millionaire film producer, who was recently arrested and charged with rape and other offenses.  He is currently facing allegations of sexual assault by over 80 women.  While these allegations triggered the #MeToo movement to go viral, the "Weinstein Effect" has elicited a much wider discussion of the topic of sexual harassment and abuse, especially within politics, the music industry, and sport. 

This was recently in evidence in Ireland during a widely publicised rape trial of four rugby players, two of whom have played internationally for the Irish rugby team.  While all four were ultimately found to be not guilty of the rape of a 19 year old girl, the factual details of what happened to the girl disgusted the entire nation.  As a result, it spawned the #IBelieveHer hashtag, which was every bit as viral within Ireland as the #MeToo hashtag which preceded it.

Inevitably, therefore, there was quickly a backlash to the #MeToo movement.  The reflexive response was that all male misbehaviour shouldn't ever be lumped together.  Many questioned the true motives and aim of the MeToo movement.  Was it meant to inspire change in all men?  Or was the movement aimed at a small percentage of men, those untouchables who abused their power, together with countless vulnerable women in the process?  It was claimed that some actresses, especially ones who were not particularly famous, were somehow jumping on the MeToo "bandwagon". 

The inexplicable thinking behind this accusation was that there main motivation was the publicity they would get as a result of claiming to be a victim of sexual assault by a high powered member of the Hollywood establishment.  Most recently, motivational speaker Anthony Robbins caused controversy with comments he made about the #MeToo movement.  At a seminar held in California in March, Robbins told the audience: "If you use the #MeToo movement to try to get significance and certainty by attacking and destroying someone else, all you've done is basically use a drug called significance to make yourself feel good". 

When you have the world's most famous motivational speaker saying such things publicly, you know for absolute sure that the #MeToo movement is a divisive topic, with outrage-inducing opinions being expressed on both sides.  Yet I believe there is a much wider factor involved in all of this, which is not being discussed at all by anyone.  It is an undiagnosed problem and one which is every bit as widespread and damaging as the sexual abuse and assault suffered by women worldwide. 

The #MeToo movement was started by women for women.  The very fact that women have caused the hashtag to go viral so quickly is absolute proof that sexual assault and harassment is commonplace all over the world.  Those women, who have been brave enough to speak out about the abuse they have suffered, have been supported by other women, who have each used their varying degrees of influence and resources to spread the message via their social media networks. 

In this regard, the #MeToo movement has been an enormous success.  It provides clear proof that a enormously powerful and truly significant message can be spread all across the planet, using the wonder of online communication.  Witness the behaviour and actions of the majority of men worldwide, however, from the very start of the #MeToo movement back in October 2017 all the way up until now.  

Lets begin with the male-driven media.  Predictably, they used the various allegations and subsequent revelations to fuel countless stories, which they immediately broadcast through their newspapers, magazines and social media channels.  Every story benefits from having a good villain.  Harvey Weinstein was absolutely ideal in this regard, given the huge amount of women contacting the media with story after story of sexual assault.  For about 6 months straight, every day was like Christmas Day for those working within the media industry.  Stories and interviews with those claiming to be victims of Weinstein's alleged sexual assault were readily and willingly supplied by those willing to share their stories.  When stories about Harvey Weinstein ran out of steam, the media simply targeted another high-profile Hollywood celebrity and repeated the exact same process all over again. 

For a while, it seemed that if a Hollywood actor wasn't himself being accused of sexual assault, he was instead being asked about his friendship with either Harvey Weinstein or another of those accused of sexual assault.  Finally, there were the self-serving, vomit-inducing statements released by high profile actors, none of whom had ever previously spoken out against the horrible treatment of women with their industry. When it became necessary to do so in order to protect their own careers, however, they were suddenly all over social media in their droves, offering meaningless messages of "support" to women.

It is very easy for the general public to vilify certain celebrities, whether they be from the world of film, politics or sport. It is equally convenient to attribute the problems highlighted by the #MeToo movement to the abuse carried out by a tiny minority of extremely powerful men.  What about the actions, or rather lack thereof, of the majority of men worldwide?  What have they done in response to the very serious message communicated across the world by a huge collective of women of all ages and backgrounds? 

Truth be told, they have done little if anything at all........  

The proper response from men was not to replicate the actions of women, by including the #MeToohashtag in a series of social media posts.  Neither was it to participate in protest marches as a means of supporting women and the #MeToo movement.  Both of these actions are inspired by good intentions and make all involved feel better about themselves for "doing something".  Nevertheless, the proper response is actually a very straight-forward one, albeit one which would cause permanent and positive changes across the planet for both women and men.

If we can all accept and agree that men are the cause of all the problems linked to the #MeToo movement, we can also equally agree and accept that men are equally responsible for the solution too.  Abuse of women, whether it be physical, mental or sexual, is not limited to the actions of Hollywood celebrities, powerful politicians and famous sportsmen.  While it may seem entirely unnecessary to point this out, it is so easy for all of us to be so distracted by various forms of media, which bombard us constantly from all angles every waking second of every single day.

Turn off the TV, switch off your cellphone and realise one thing.  These crimes happen here and not "there" and take place on a daily basis all around you.  According to the Rape Crisis Network Ireland, the number of recorded rapes increased nearly 30% last year.  It is estimated that 85% of men who commit sexual assaults are known to their victims.  Those guilty are not famous in any way.  They are among the general population with whom we work, socialise and co-habit.  Martin Luther King Jr once declared that "to ignore evil is to become an accomplice to it".  On the 50th anniversary of his untimely death, it seems we still have not progressed any further. 

Yet the solution to the problems associated with the #MeToo movement is simple yet profound.  Men who truly want to improve things for women literally need to do just one thing: lead by example.  As has always been the case, actions speak much louder than any words.  Instead of ranting about how unjust and unfair the world us, men instead need to take this opportunity to step up to the plate and create a whole new world together with the women who support their actions. 

How? 

By taking inspiration from the very women who themselves have already successfully worked together with each other in the first place.  More than anything, the #MeToo movement has emphatically demonstrated the immense power that can be manifested by the combination of intention, communication and collaboration.  In response, men can take their lead and use the exact same process to essentially create a totally different world, one in which women feel valued and respected by the men who live to serve and protect them.  

The problems associated with the #MeToo movement have ultimately been caused not by actions of a tiny minority, but rather the non-actions of the huge majority.  The solution starts at home, with men simply being the very best they can be as fathers, sons and brothers.  Every single household serves as an example to the generations which follow.  Young boys are taught how to treat women properly.  At the same time, young girls are taught how men are to treat them and to never accept anything else than the love, respect and support that every single female deserves.  Once this is happening, thriving communities of like-minded individuals can be built, one which exists both online and offline.  Not only will this community connect men and women together deeply on a social and personal level, it will also provide a platform through which male and female entrepreneurs from all backgrounds and cultures can collaborate, co-create and cultivate the economy too.  

Are you ready to be part of the solution?  

#MeToo

Paul Hurley is co-founder of Tribe Shift, an online community platform, which uses tribal principles to help members with their personal and professional development.

To find out more, go to www.tribeshift.com

 

 

 

How Is Hypnosis Already Affecting Your Life?

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Regardless of whether you are aware of it or not, hypnosis has always been a part of your life and always will be.  So many people, unfortunately, are unaware of this and live their lives according to the scripts given to them by others.

Confused?

Good!

Keep reading......

In this age of technology, it is easy to look outside of yourself and forget how powerful you already are.  So many of us marvel at how we currently have pocket-sized mobile phones that are more powerful than 1980s supercomputers that took up entire rooms.  As impressive as that undoubtedly is, however, that is nothing compared to the power of the organic computer which is located between your two ears.  

A new study suggests that the human brain’s capacity is 10 times larger than previously believed.  Based on research carried out at the Salk Institute for Biological Studies, it is now estimated that the memory capacity of the human brain is at least 1 petabyte.  For those of you wondering how exactly big that actually is, it is in the same ballpark as the total amount of information contained on the entire World Wide Web.

It is perhaps a matter of time before technology finally catches up with us.  For now, however, our current computers remain far behind what human evolution has created over millions of years.  Computers lack one critical component: the ability to change their connections. The enormous power of the human brain comes from its amazing ability to change its connections based on the information that it receives, combined with its interpretation of this information.

Computers are limited because they follow algorithms, set patterns that have been programmed into them.   As a result, they are unable to change their structure based on experience.  Human brains, on the other hand, excel at exactly this.  Its ability to do exactly this results in learning, memory and the ability to adapt to your environment in a dynamic and constructive way.

So what does this all have to do with hypnosis, I hear you ask?

Great question!

Imagine that your brain consists of two parts: 

1) The Conscious Mind
2) The Subconscious Mind
3) The Critical Factor

The Conscious Mind

The Conscious Mind consists of the Analytical and Logical parts of the mind.  Whilst reading this article, for example, both parts are constantly at work, trying to make sense of and evaluate the information contained within it.  

The Subconscious Mind

All of your memories, both short- are stored in your Subconscious Mind.  Things that you thought you forgot are actually part of your permanent memory.  Your subconscious memory is like a non-stop video recording of your life.  Nothing is judged, filtered, distorted or analysed.  It is non-judgmental.  Once it enters the Subconscious mind, it is just stored there.  Our emotions and habits are determined by the Subconscious Mind.

The Critical Factor

Due to the fact that the Subconscious Mind is non-judgmental, the Conscious Mind works to protect it, doing its absolute best to ensure that no damaging beliefs or suggestions are accepted.  Both the Logical and Analytical parts of the Conscious Mind work together choosing what to accept or reject.  They put up a barrier called the Critical Factor, which compares new information to existing beliefs and associated pieces of information learned in the past and held in permanent memory of the Subconscious Mind.  If the new information is significantly different, it is rejected as being not true. 

Unfortunately, you don't develop your critical factor until you are approximately midway into your childhood.  You believe everything your parents tell you because you trust them unconditionally and have yet to develop your ability to think critically.  Your teachers, peers, environment, family and what you see on the television all fill your mind with beliefs and suggestions.  Since you are blissfully unaware of everything you are unconsciously absorbing, you have absolutely no choice as to what to reject or accept.  

This is where so many limiting beliefs are formed.  Maybe you were taunted about your weight in school and as a result, you believe you are a fat person.  On the other hand, it might have been a totally harmless comment, made by someone, which you interpreted in such a way that caused you hurt and pain.  Many parents unwittingly pass on their limiting beliefs to their children.  Believing that they themselves are overweight because of their parents, they pass on the same limiting beliefs to their kids.  Such beliefs are stored deep in the Subconscious and, until changed, have a huge effect on that person's habits throughout their lives. 


You came into this world as a wonderful co-creation of unconditional love.  Everything about you was absolutely and undeniably perfect in every way.  Since then, however, you have picked up beliefs which have caused you to doubt this.  This has caused you to feel fear, the opposite of love.  Fear ultimately manifests itself in the guise of addiction, dysfunction and disease.

Are you unhappy with the results you are getting in life?


Is your life been affected by long-held feelings of sadness, anger or guilt?

If you have answered YES to either of these questions, realise what causes your results and feelings (both good and bad) in the first place.

Your beliefs create your actions

Your actions create your habits

Your habits create your results

Your results create your feelings

The good news is that you can remove all of the negative hypnosis which is holding you back in life.  The even better news is that you can replace it with positive self-hypnosis of your own choice.  This will help you to gain new understandings and perspectives of everything you have ever experienced in the past.  In doing so, you will break old patterns and introduce empowering beliefs and positive habits.  This is truly the "secret" to getting results and living a happy and fulfilling life.

Self-hypnosis empowers you with the ability to program YOUR mind exactly the way YOU want.  You wouldn't neglect your computer by failing to upgrade it if Windows 95 had been installed in it by someone else, would you?  Likewise, you would make sure to remove harmful viruses from your computer too, right?  If so, why not take equal care of the most powerful computer ever likely to be developed - your amazing brain.  

Uninstall the old software (limiting beliefs) and eliminate the viruses (fear) which slow you down and prevent you from performing at your best.  In their place, upgrade the hardware which is your brain with new software in the form of empowering beliefs.  This will immediately provide you with the personal power to break free from the past so that you can live the life YOU want.

To find out more about self-hypnosis, go to www.callpaul.ie

Einstein, Hypnosis and Happiness

Whilst teaching at Princeton university, Albert Einstein gave an exam to an advanced class of physics students. 

Although there is nothing remotely unusual about this, what was unusual was the fact that it was the fact that it was the exact same exam he had given the previous year.

His teaching assistant was perplexed.  He never expected such behaviour from a man regarded by many to be the greatest physicist of the 20th century.

"How could you give the same exam to the same class two years in a row?"

Einstein's answer was short and simple.

"The answers have changed"

At that time, the world of physics was undergoing huge and dramatic changes over a very short period of time.  Whenever there was a new breakthrough or discovery, many theories long considered to be absolute fact were suddenly proven to be erroneous and downright false. Consequently, it was possible for the very same exam to have totally different answers from one year to another.

So how does this relate to you and your life?

Well, the above example refers to the rapid changes which were occurring nearly 100 years ago.  In today's world of modern technology, every aspect of life is changing at a rate that surely even Einstein himself wouldn't have ever imagined.

Because of this, it is very likely that the answers to your own life are changing more quickly today and ever before.  What worked so effectively to get you from Point A to Point B might actually be completely useless if you try to use it to move from Point B to Point C.

It is therefore vital to accept that rapid change in every area of your life is both unavoidable and inevitable.  Rather than being controlled by change, you can instead become an active agent of change, adjusting your sails to move in the direction you want to go in life.  This first starts in your mind. 

Your mind dictates your everyday thoughts and beliefs about life.  These dictate your actions, the results you get, and ultimately the way you feel about your life.

Hypnosis is such a catalyst for rapid change because it enables you to view things from an infinitely more powerful perspective than before.  By temporarily disengaging from the analytical and rational thinking of the conscious mind, you are free to tap into the genius of your unconscious mind. 

Your unconscious mind knows all the answers precisely because all of your problems were unconsciously and unwittingly created by you in the first place.  Since hypnosis involves direct communication with your unconscious mind, it is possible for you to quickly make powerful, positive and permanent changes to your entire life.

If you want to change your life, you must first change your mind!

 

Fix Your Golf Slice With Hypnosis

For any golfer, the most frustrating thing to happen is surely hitting the dreaded slice shot. Nothing screams “Amateur!” quite like the sight of your golf ball curving to the right in the air and landing in a very awkward position in the woods.

While there are a variety of technical problems that golfers can overcome, playing good golf is simply impossible unless you learn how to stop hitting shots with an open clubface.

It is estimated that as many of 90% of golfers struggle with a slice. When they look for the solution from instructors, the advice they get is to focus on two things. 

Firstly, they are told to evaluate their equipment to make sure they are using a driver with enough loft. 

Secondly, the instructor will make adjustments to their grip. Many players use a grip with the thumbs pointing straight down the handle. This type of grip is too weak. By turning your hands away from your target so that your palms are parallel, your grip instantly becomes stronger.

Many golf spend lots of time, money and effort trying to fix their slice. They follow all the recommendations and yet their slicing problems continue and their frustration grows and grows.

Why is this?

Before adjusting your physical swing, you first need to adjust your mental swing.

Here is why.

You might consciously know all the golf techniques and steps to follow when preparing for a shot. Your habits, however, are determined by your unconscious thinking and are hardwired into your physiology. 

To achieve consistency, you need to program your brain into instantly and automatically being able to play the right shot at exactly the right time. This should never be a struggle of any kind. Like top pros play when they are in The Zone, it should all flow easily and effortlessly.

Use hypnosis to fix your mental swing and kiss slice shots goodbye forever. 

http://www.callpaulhypnosis.com/elite-performance

Why Diets Always Work But Never Work!

Despite what the majority of people tend to think, much of my work as a hypnotist involves taking clients OUT of hypnosis. In the case of phobia removal, for example, clients comes to me already deep in hypnosis, which is the very cause of their irrational fear. By using hypnotic trance to enable new understands and perspectives on a subconscious level, it is possible to easily remove the phobic response to whatever previously terrified the client.

In the case of weight loss, the general public is in a very deep state of hypnosis, which is causing the problem of obesity to literally grow and grow bigger with each passing year. Much of this hypnosis comes in the form of mass conditioning by the media. Think about it. We listen to the experts, follow all their advice and still we remain overweight. How is this so?

Pause for a moment and think about all the diets you have heard and read about in recent years. Every diet had its own little hook, which makes it stand out from the others. Likewise, every diet has legion of die-hard followers who swear that their diet is the only one that has ever worked for them.

Real-world evidence, however, illustrates the real truth. The fact of the matter is that you every single diet will work once it involves some form of caloric restriction. Simply put, if you cut your calories over an extended period for as little as a month, you will lose weight no matter what kind of foods you eat during this time.

A tiny percentage of people can diet continuously, restricting the calories they eat and never giving into the temptation of making “bad” food choices. For the rest of us, however, dieting is simply too stressful, too limiting and far too boring to turn into life-long eating habits. Food, like life itself, is there to be enjoyed, right? Right!

If you look at things from a purely scientific basis, diets will always work once there is calorie-deficit for an extended period of time. If you look at things from a purely psychological basis, you quickly understand why diets never actually work in the long term for the majority of individuals. This is because of one simple factor: willpower.

So many people believe that if only they had more willpower, they'd achieve their goals easily and effortlessly. When they fail, they blame themselves and attribute their failure to their lack of this seemingly magical ingredient of success.

Rely on willpower, however, and you will fail each and every time. 

There is a simple reason for this and it is the same for everyone. Willpower is part of the Conscious Mind. It is only designed to provide very short ­term motivation, and is never meant to be relied upon for permanent change.

Willpower will help you to refuse a single offer of a piece of chocolate but it will never, by itself, enable you to give up chocolate permanently.

Think of willpower as being like "mental adrenalin".

Adrenalin provides you with a short ­term burst of extra strength in an emergency situation, after which it diminishes back to normal levels. Willpower is exactly the same.

Say, for example, you want to give up chips and you use willpower to help you attain this goal. You will hold out for as long as you can, maintaining the struggle for as long as possible. It might be a week, a month or even 6 months. One day, however, your willpower reserves will eventually expire and you will eat a big plate of chips.

Most people, only knowing the one method, will blame themselves and return to another tortuous path of willpower-fueled deprivation. This time, however, will be a little different. Whereas you may have been able to hold out for as long as 6 months the first time, you may struggle to last even half that length of time the second time around. Since its reserves are limited, your willpower levels diminish until they eventually expire to nothing.

If you want to make permanent changes in your life, be sure to realise that doing so is impossible using willpower alone. This is why diets are ineffective for long ­term change. Since they are based on deprivation and "being good", it's only a matter of time until you give in and revert to those "bad" foods once again. 

Being healthy, slim and fit does not mean a life of suffering and pain. When you change the way your brain works, then your thoughts change and the way you act changes too. Different actions cause different results. 

So realise that it ALL starts off in your mind.

Paul Hurley (BSc Sports Hypnosis) has been working as a Weight Loss Hypnotist for over 15 years. His book “Think And Be Slim” explains how to use hypnosis to lose weight easily and permanently. 

To find out more, go to www.callpaul.ie

How Hypnosis Works - The Importance of Mindset

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Forget fancy hypnotic inductions or fantastic scripts.  The pre-talk is the most important part of any hypnosis session.  With it, it greatly ensures that your client will get the very best results possible. Without it, you risk the client missing out on the benefits of hypnosis altogether.  Yes, the pre-talk really is that important.

In a previous article, I've already spoken about the need to eliminate myths and misconceptions about hypnosis during the pre-talk.  This is because people accept hypnosis in direct correlation to the amount of fear they have about it.  If they are scared of hypnosis, it will be absolutely impossible for them to relax and properly participate during the session.  

In this article, I'm going to talk about the importance of the client's attitude before each hypnosis session.  This is another vital part of a hypnosis session and its importance can never be overstated.  

When a client is in hypnosis and is given a suggestion by a hypnotist, he/she has a choice of 4 attitudes to adopt in relation to the suggestion:

Mental Attitude # 1

"I don't know; it sounds a little uncomfortable to me. It just doesn't fit me."

Change is initially uncomfortable for everybody.  In order for things to change, however, things must change!  And this includes accepting new suggestions which lead to new (and superior) results in your life.

Mental Attitude # 2

"I like that suggestion. I hope it works!"

Many people play the lottery every week and "hope" they win.  Hoping something will happen means you are leaving things to fate.  You must take ownership of the results you want to get, harness your resources of personal power and make great things happen by yourself.

Mental Attitude # 3

"I'm neutral about it. I don't care if I get it or don't get it."

This is the very worst type of attitude.  It is only ever really possessed by someone who really doesn't want to be there.  For example, smokers often hire hypnotists because their spouses told them to try hypnosis.  Many times, they will hire a hypnotist with absolutely no desire to stop smoking in the first place.  They simply want to return home to their partners and tell them that they tried hypnosis and it "didn't work".  

Getting results with a client who possesses this type of attitude is absolutely impossible.  As a hypnotist, I therefore screen my prospective clients very carefully to ensure they are very serious about getting results.  This ensures that neither my time nor my clients' money is ever wasted.

Mental Attitude # 4

"I like that suggestion. I know it's going to work for me!"

This is the only mental attitude that will ever cause the suggestion to be accepted.   Adopting Attitudes 1, 2 or 3 will cause the suggestion to be rejected, thus preventing positive change.

Simply put, attitude is everything!

www.callpaul.ie